Every morning i have a little packet of oats for breakfast. We have this love/hate relationship!!! They are messy little bitches. Not one morning will go past where i dont mess my oats somewhere.
Yesterday my cousin, Kelly, had the funniest thing happen to her. She was sitting at work eating oats when her boss walked in. He stood infront of her desk and kept on wiping his lip. So my cousin sticks her tongue out and thinks theres something there and licks her lips. So her boss takes his finger and scratches the right side of his lip. By this time she cant effing find the piece of oats that is stuck on her lip. Eventually she finds it with her boss laughing and her blushing. Bright spark over here (me) is laughing my head off at her, thinking how on earth can you not feel it! When little did i know it was my turn the next day!
I got to work this morning and made my oats. Everyone had come into work by this time, so i had a full office. I sat all quietly fighting with my packet of oats cause they wouldnt open, when i finally tore the packet open swearing at it, it spilt everywhere, so i calmly picked it all up off the counter and applied the 10 second rule (pretty gross i know), got it safely in my bowl and waited for the kettle to boil, then the water came gushing out splashing all over my shirt and half the oats were out the bowl AGAIN, so i checked around to make sure that no one was watching me and AGAIN applied the 10 second rule :)
Finally i was back at my desk enjoying my mess up of a breakfast. Eating away, i finished my whole bowl and took it to the kitchen. On the way back to my desk i stopped in the accountants office for a little chat, her and her clients all sitting nicely staring at me with wierd expressions on their faces, I just thought i looked nice today or something!?
So i wondered off back to my desk, one of the clients came in to collect some things, once again looking at me like an effing wierdo. BUT i carried on working, a sales man came past trying to sell me something with his eyes fixed on my chin, so starting to feel a bit uneasy i went to the bathroom to find, im not lying, like a spoooooon full of oats on my face!!!!!!!!!! seriously, why did no one just tell me! It must have looked so gross!! So if any of you that saw it on me and forgot to mention that i had half of Europe on my face, IT WAS NOT A SIF SORE or some type of disease. It was oats!
So oats, thank you for fulling my tummy in the mornings... BUT i hate you, that is all.....
Ash :)
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
My brother, my best friend!
Okay sooo, i phoned my brother the other day to see how things were and he was quite disappointed with his 'about brands' section in my first blog, so heres a post just for him!!!!
When my mom and my step dad met, Brands and i hated eachother. He used to tease me so much and i couldnt stand that. On my 7th birthday i had all my friends over with a jumping castle and he told everyone that i scratched my bum :) hey! when you 7 thats a big thing! So anyway we didnt get along at all.
We moved to Cape town shortly after that, just my step dad, mom and myself. I hadnt seen Brands in a while, when him and Dazz came to visit us for the school holidays. I had (just before they came) stitches in my foot and couldnt walk. When they arrived Brands was all awesome and grown up, he carried me EVERYWHERE on his back and helped me alot that holiday, that was when our "bond" was formed.
We ended up moving back to Scottburgh where brands moved in with us and this was just too amazing for me, having my big brother there, who was now a cop! I mean what teenage girl doesnt want that, no one gave me shit. Every heartbreak or bad day, he was there to cheer me up, take me driving, pay for my gym and hunt down any guy that hurt his "little sister". He went from my big brother to my best biggest brother and bestfriend!
As i got older the more closer we got. Thats when the sneaking out started. Brands was the getaway car with me and a friend bolting for the car door as we went drinking and partying. Bad influence?? ;)
Then we moved to Australia and it killed me to think that i would be away from my big brother, my best friend was being taken away from me, who i went from seeing every single day to nothing at all. My other half was ripped away and its sucked!!!! Didnt stop us from chatting everyday though.
Then one day when everything was fine in Aus we got a phone call. My sister begged on the phone to phone back urgently. We called back and received the WORST news. My brother had been shot, and no one knew if he was going to make it. Hearing that news made me sick to my stomach, tears just flowed as i fell to the ground thinking that he was gone, now he was really gone, not just in distance but in life. I cant even explain the things that go though your head or the feelings that you feel when someone that important to you is almost dead. We flew back from Aus the day after that to see my brother who hadnt said a word yet and was in ICU. I am proud to say that my brother is the strongest person i know. He made it through it all and has recovered so well.
SO Brands, i hope you're reading this. I just want you to know that you are so IMPORTANT to me. I support you 100% in life and i will never give up or think otherwise of you. You are amazing and awesome and cool all in one. I am so PROUD and HAPPY to be able to call you my brother! Love you big bro!!!!
When my mom and my step dad met, Brands and i hated eachother. He used to tease me so much and i couldnt stand that. On my 7th birthday i had all my friends over with a jumping castle and he told everyone that i scratched my bum :) hey! when you 7 thats a big thing! So anyway we didnt get along at all.
We moved to Cape town shortly after that, just my step dad, mom and myself. I hadnt seen Brands in a while, when him and Dazz came to visit us for the school holidays. I had (just before they came) stitches in my foot and couldnt walk. When they arrived Brands was all awesome and grown up, he carried me EVERYWHERE on his back and helped me alot that holiday, that was when our "bond" was formed.
We ended up moving back to Scottburgh where brands moved in with us and this was just too amazing for me, having my big brother there, who was now a cop! I mean what teenage girl doesnt want that, no one gave me shit. Every heartbreak or bad day, he was there to cheer me up, take me driving, pay for my gym and hunt down any guy that hurt his "little sister". He went from my big brother to my best biggest brother and bestfriend!
As i got older the more closer we got. Thats when the sneaking out started. Brands was the getaway car with me and a friend bolting for the car door as we went drinking and partying. Bad influence?? ;)
Then we moved to Australia and it killed me to think that i would be away from my big brother, my best friend was being taken away from me, who i went from seeing every single day to nothing at all. My other half was ripped away and its sucked!!!! Didnt stop us from chatting everyday though.
Then one day when everything was fine in Aus we got a phone call. My sister begged on the phone to phone back urgently. We called back and received the WORST news. My brother had been shot, and no one knew if he was going to make it. Hearing that news made me sick to my stomach, tears just flowed as i fell to the ground thinking that he was gone, now he was really gone, not just in distance but in life. I cant even explain the things that go though your head or the feelings that you feel when someone that important to you is almost dead. We flew back from Aus the day after that to see my brother who hadnt said a word yet and was in ICU. I am proud to say that my brother is the strongest person i know. He made it through it all and has recovered so well.
SO Brands, i hope you're reading this. I just want you to know that you are so IMPORTANT to me. I support you 100% in life and i will never give up or think otherwise of you. You are amazing and awesome and cool all in one. I am so PROUD and HAPPY to be able to call you my brother! Love you big bro!!!!
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Easter :) makes you feel like a kid again!!!!
Am i the only 19 year old (almost 20) that has my easter eggs hidden? I mean really who wouldnt want that? besides the new number you see the next day on the scale (that i could have sworn was less last week), its awesome!!! I feel like a kid again, the feeling of waking up early to go find all the millions of easter eggs that have been hidden in hard to find places with the joy gleaming from your parentals faces (they start getting more excited) while screaming "Your hot, really hot, ok EXTREMELY HOT, dam your cold again!!!".... While your on your knees under the tree that your dog wee'd against the other night and shat just next to the place where your dad hides your easter egg cause he thinks it will be funny, you think in your head "dam this is so cool, i wish i was a kid again!!!!!".
My point is, theres a time to be serious and responsible and boring and mature but sometimes you can be lame and childish and go play in the mud and watch cartoon network (and look for easter eggs) too. Life is short and way to intense to be a grown up all the time. I heard a saying that goes "Adults are just children with money".
I, personally, think that im going to be THEE coolest mom ever. Yes i will be strict and give smacks and have rules but in the same breath im going to get down and dirty and colour in, play in the mud and just enjoy my children. Just to let you all know, i already have three possible names for a boy and a girl (although i want a boy)... My future husband has no chance in getting first names maybe he can choose a second name, maybe....
P.S Im only planning on having kids in 8-10 years :) so breath now :)
My point is, theres a time to be serious and responsible and boring and mature but sometimes you can be lame and childish and go play in the mud and watch cartoon network (and look for easter eggs) too. Life is short and way to intense to be a grown up all the time. I heard a saying that goes "Adults are just children with money".
I, personally, think that im going to be THEE coolest mom ever. Yes i will be strict and give smacks and have rules but in the same breath im going to get down and dirty and colour in, play in the mud and just enjoy my children. Just to let you all know, i already have three possible names for a boy and a girl (although i want a boy)... My future husband has no chance in getting first names maybe he can choose a second name, maybe....
P.S Im only planning on having kids in 8-10 years :) so breath now :)
Settling...
Why do people settle for things? I mean, when a girl meets a guy and finds a thousand things wrong with him in the first month, why do you still settle for him! I've settled in the past! For a guy that mentally and emotionally abused me! He pushed me around and hated when he was wrong!
So why did I stay? Have you ever had someone who broke your confidence so badly that you didn't know how to leave? Someone who would manipulate every situation but "the fight" wasn't worth it so you would just back down and accept it because settling was easy? I did that!! All the time, so now I'm just saying that my settling days are over!!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Out with the OLD and in with the NEW.
I read a book quite a while ago about a lady, whose husband cheats on her and all that, and basically she needs to change her life and get rid of all the old things and bring in the new, like try new things.
Soooo i figured why cant we live our life like a book? Dont you wish it was that easy? A beginning, a body and a happy ending. But then again they say that: how is a happy ending happy, if it ends?
I guess i was forced to grow up quickly. I finished school at the age of 16, studied and worked. Im turning 20 this year and am happy to say that my oh my have i had a hectic 4 years!!!! So im just writing to say that who cares about all the hectic shit that goes down in your life, if your still kicking then why not just learn and move on,every bad or hard experience only makes you who you are today. Okay! phew now that thats out, i got a story for you guys :)
Two weeks ago i decided to have my very fluffy awesome white boots washed and hung on the line to dry. About 2 days later i decided that i wanted to bust out my fluffy-ness. I pulled them off the line with a huge grin on my face and put my hand inside the boot to feel if they were dry enough to wear, when i picked up something rolling in the boot... Pulled it out, to find it was a nice wet soggy piece of DOG SHIT!!!!!! All squished up on my hand. I swear it was basically staring back me saying: ''mwahahah yeah take that bitch".
So anyway after much thought about how it could have got in there, i came to the conclusion that my maid had washed them, and put them on the floor then my little small dog, must have strained extremely hard to get his ass nicely on the top of my very long boot and let it out, right? WRONG!!!!
Peter (my dad) decided it would be a huge joke to put it in my boot :) Can you feel the love? BUT paybacks a bitch :) just saying...
Soooo i figured why cant we live our life like a book? Dont you wish it was that easy? A beginning, a body and a happy ending. But then again they say that: how is a happy ending happy, if it ends?
I guess i was forced to grow up quickly. I finished school at the age of 16, studied and worked. Im turning 20 this year and am happy to say that my oh my have i had a hectic 4 years!!!! So im just writing to say that who cares about all the hectic shit that goes down in your life, if your still kicking then why not just learn and move on,every bad or hard experience only makes you who you are today. Okay! phew now that thats out, i got a story for you guys :)
Two weeks ago i decided to have my very fluffy awesome white boots washed and hung on the line to dry. About 2 days later i decided that i wanted to bust out my fluffy-ness. I pulled them off the line with a huge grin on my face and put my hand inside the boot to feel if they were dry enough to wear, when i picked up something rolling in the boot... Pulled it out, to find it was a nice wet soggy piece of DOG SHIT!!!!!! All squished up on my hand. I swear it was basically staring back me saying: ''mwahahah yeah take that bitch".
So anyway after much thought about how it could have got in there, i came to the conclusion that my maid had washed them, and put them on the floor then my little small dog, must have strained extremely hard to get his ass nicely on the top of my very long boot and let it out, right? WRONG!!!!
Peter (my dad) decided it would be a huge joke to put it in my boot :) Can you feel the love? BUT paybacks a bitch :) just saying...
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
me, my life, my family, oh and my car!!!
So im new to this whole blog thing and i figured that seeing as its about my life, why not tell you about....my life? :)
Me- Im Ash, for those of you who dont know. I like to think im fun and bubbly and care free, but really i am also a human who cries and worries about my hair and all that stuff. Im wierd and extrememly random, but no matter what, im always smiling.
My Family- I possibly have the LARGEST family known to man :) My parents got divorced when i was 4. Im an only child from my moms side, she re-married my awesome step dad. He then gave me three beautiful siblings... My step brothers and sister-blister :). My dad is a wierdo. But nevertheless he gave me two brothers.
The Characters:
My mom- The best woman i know, shes my best friend, my rock. Shes a perfectionist and beautiful and funny all in one. She could party me under the table ANYDAY
Peter- My step dad... Hes like my real dad, did i say step dad?? what!! Hes been in my life for the past 17 years and i wouldnt change it for anyone or anything, we argue NON-STOP but that us, love him to death!
Grandpaa Geoff- Fell in love with my moms best friend who's 48. Yes you read right, my grandpas a PIMP.. But seriously the most sweetest gentleman i have ever met.
Sheena-Bee- my sister blister. We have our own language and when we are in the same room together its havoc, shes my idol and possibly the best female influence i have in my life, accept for when she snort-laughs... :)
Brands- my oldest brother... He is an absolute inspiration, he got shot 3 times.. He always used to say that bullets bounce off him cause hes made of steel, guess that was true!
Dazzie- my younger-older brother- Ive never met someone who could tell you about literally 99 different blades of grass, hes a nature freak, we're leo, we argue but in any situation we have eachothers backs. He doesnt admit it, but secretly he's one of the most intelligent people i know and definitely has the softest squishiest most lovable heart!
Cody-king of all doggies- Hes like my brother, ive never met a dog more like a human in my life. He eats human food, basically talks, and wait for it, only drinks water out the water machine OUT OF A GLASS... He is possibly the most loved child, in our family when it comes to Peter!
Faith- my little UNO. Shes a little bitch sometimes, she likes to cut out and takes ages to warm up but i LOVE her. We've recently met, and i can feel a hectic bond coming on here :D
My family, is so awesomely wierd and funny and the best thing about us, is our ability to stick together through any and every situation that arises!!! They are my world, and without any of them, i wouldnt make it through not even ONE day!
Me- Im Ash, for those of you who dont know. I like to think im fun and bubbly and care free, but really i am also a human who cries and worries about my hair and all that stuff. Im wierd and extrememly random, but no matter what, im always smiling.
My Family- I possibly have the LARGEST family known to man :) My parents got divorced when i was 4. Im an only child from my moms side, she re-married my awesome step dad. He then gave me three beautiful siblings... My step brothers and sister-blister :). My dad is a wierdo. But nevertheless he gave me two brothers.
The Characters:
My mom- The best woman i know, shes my best friend, my rock. Shes a perfectionist and beautiful and funny all in one. She could party me under the table ANYDAY
Peter- My step dad... Hes like my real dad, did i say step dad?? what!! Hes been in my life for the past 17 years and i wouldnt change it for anyone or anything, we argue NON-STOP but that us, love him to death!
Grandpaa Geoff- Fell in love with my moms best friend who's 48. Yes you read right, my grandpas a PIMP.. But seriously the most sweetest gentleman i have ever met.
Sheena-Bee- my sister blister. We have our own language and when we are in the same room together its havoc, shes my idol and possibly the best female influence i have in my life, accept for when she snort-laughs... :)
Brands- my oldest brother... He is an absolute inspiration, he got shot 3 times.. He always used to say that bullets bounce off him cause hes made of steel, guess that was true!
Dazzie- my younger-older brother- Ive never met someone who could tell you about literally 99 different blades of grass, hes a nature freak, we're leo, we argue but in any situation we have eachothers backs. He doesnt admit it, but secretly he's one of the most intelligent people i know and definitely has the softest squishiest most lovable heart!
Cody-king of all doggies- Hes like my brother, ive never met a dog more like a human in my life. He eats human food, basically talks, and wait for it, only drinks water out the water machine OUT OF A GLASS... He is possibly the most loved child, in our family when it comes to Peter!
Faith- my little UNO. Shes a little bitch sometimes, she likes to cut out and takes ages to warm up but i LOVE her. We've recently met, and i can feel a hectic bond coming on here :D
My family, is so awesomely wierd and funny and the best thing about us, is our ability to stick together through any and every situation that arises!!! They are my world, and without any of them, i wouldnt make it through not even ONE day!
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