Oats!!!!!!!!

Every morning i have a little packet of oats for breakfast. We have this love/hate relationship!!! They are messy little bitches. Not one morning will go past where i dont mess my oats somewhere.

Yesterday my cousin, Kelly, had the funniest thing happen to her. She was sitting at work eating oats when her boss walked in. He stood infront of her desk and kept on wiping his lip. So my cousin sticks her tongue out and thinks theres something there and licks her lips. So her boss takes his finger and scratches the right side of his lip. By this time she cant effing find the piece of oats that is stuck on her lip. Eventually she finds it with her boss laughing and her blushing. Bright spark over here (me) is laughing my head off at her, thinking how on earth can you not feel it! When little did i know it was my turn the next day!

I got to work this morning and made my oats. Everyone had come into work by this time, so i had a full office. I sat all quietly fighting with my packet of oats cause they wouldnt open, when i finally tore the packet open swearing at it, it spilt everywhere, so i calmly picked it all up off the counter and applied the 10 second rule (pretty gross i know), got it safely in my bowl and waited for the kettle to boil, then the water came gushing out splashing all over my shirt and half the oats were out the bowl AGAIN, so i checked around to make sure that no one was watching me and AGAIN applied the 10 second rule :)

Finally i was back at my desk enjoying my mess up of a breakfast. Eating away, i finished my whole bowl and took it to the kitchen. On the way back to my desk i stopped in the accountants office for a little chat, her and her clients all sitting nicely staring at me with wierd expressions on their faces, I just thought i looked nice today or something!?

So i wondered off back to my desk, one of the clients came in to collect some things, once again looking at me like an effing wierdo. BUT i carried on working, a sales man came past trying to sell me something with his eyes fixed on my chin, so starting to feel a bit uneasy i went to the bathroom to find, im not lying, like a spoooooon full of oats on my face!!!!!!!!!! seriously, why did no one just tell me! It must have looked so gross!! So if any of you that saw it on me and forgot to mention that i had half of Europe on my face, IT WAS NOT A SIF SORE or some type of disease. It was oats!

So oats, thank you for fulling my tummy in the mornings... BUT i hate you, that is all.....